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Park River , North Dakota
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April 3, 2013     Walsh County Press
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April 3, 2013
 

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PAGE 4 PRESS PERSPECTIVES APRIL 3, 2013 F ROM TH E EDITOR'S DESK... BY ALLISON OLIMB EDITOR, WALSH COUNTY PRESS April Fools is probably my least favorite day of the entire cal- endar. There is funny and then there is just plain stupid. According to the encyclopedia, the origins of the idea behind the day extend back to the Roman fes- tival of Hilaria and the Medieval Feast of Fools. The placement of April 1 can be traced back by hun- dreds of years in the literary world. One of the earlier references of the day was in Chaucer's Canterbury Tales when in "The Nun's Priest's Tale" a proud rooster is tricked by a fox. But if you spend enough time searching for the origins of the day there are more lies than truth to help conclude that the exact be- .ginnings of the obnoxiousness of the day are fairly difficult to de- cipher. One story was that in the days before reality television and "Jer- sey Shore" the jesters who served as entertainment petitioned for a day where they could rule, so the emperor made one king for a day offering up a feast of fools. Whether or not I believe any of it goes back to why I can't stand this fool's holiday. Whether your dog died or your house caught fire, or you have a treat to share, or you saved a ton of money by switch- ing to Geico, I r ally don't care. I won't believe a thing you have to say or do until April 2. The majority of the time pranks aren't even funny, they are just lies designed to annoy. As for the media hoaxes meant to be hilarious most of the time they are just plain silly. It) 1996, Taco Bell announced they would be buying the Liberty Bell and renaming it the Taco Liberty Bell. In .1998, Burger King created a Left-Handed Whopper with the same ingredients as a whopper but designed to fit in a left hand. This year American Eagle was .selling Skinny Skinny jeans that were just 'sway paint available in two colors. Sometimes they work and oth- er times they are just faked deaths and political scandals. This April Fools the sun may have been out and the Twins have been out on the field, but with the piles of snow and 25 degrees on the temperature gauge I feel like the joke was on us. We could have done without the pranks this year. Like" the Walsh County Press on Face- book and check out ou*' blog at http.'//waLs'h- court (vl~ress. wordpress, corn Hello, . This may go down in history as the "spring" that never was. Actual temperatures or wind chills below zero nearly every night. And the wind. You remember that old song that went something like "They call the wind Mariah"? I've called it a lot more names that are more descriptive than Mariah the last few weeks. You see, it's the heifers. I bought all these heifers for Shirley. Because all I gave her at Christmas was a stopper for the kitchen sink. And I was feeling guilty. She's get: ting a little older and a little wis- er. She didnff jump up and down and cheer bec'au e she would be able to check heifers at night. No, she didn't. Because she has kind of bad knees. And walking around in a yard full of frozen cow poop with a flashlight is not real- ly good for someone with sore knees. But...nothing too good for a cowgirl! I made that up. When, I purchased the heifers, I assured Shirley that the long- range forecast was for a mild, warm march. I made that up too. i'm gord at making stuffup (like the dog John). Anyway it's not turning out like that. And then, I was going to lie to you, my readers. And that hurt. You see, lately I've been limping around. When people ask me what happen@, I tell them a horse kicked me. Or a cow stepped on my foot. Or I was changing the yard light and the ladder slid and I fell and injured my leg. But, I have a conscience, and couldn't maintain those lies. I have an ingrown toenail. Sor- ry. But I had to tell someone. So what does Shirley tell me I have to do? Dig it out! Dig it out! 'Dig it out? It brought me to a screaming fit when I just stared or pointed at it. It was bad. Really bad. So I did like on TV, I phoned a friend. He said, "Dig it out! It will make you cry, but dig it out!" I told him to go to hell. i would rather limp. So I googled it. Yup. I googled tit. For a home remedy. And I found one. Soak your foot in Ep- som salt water for twenty minutes. Hot water. Real hot water. I think Shirley actua!ly enjoyed watching me scream as I stuck that throb- bing foot in that kettle of hot wa- ter. If I would have had feathers, you could have plucked me clean. Remember how those scalded chickens stunk? But that's anoth- er story. Back to the remedy. After scald- ing that painful foot for twenty minutes, slice a raw onion, and rub that raw onion on the toe. That did- n't hurt as bad as it sounds, be- cause I think Shirley had killed most of the nerves with the hot wa-. ter. So, I rubbed and squeezed that raw onion on that big old shiny red toe. Then to top it off, ! had to wrap it in basil leaves. We have. basil growing in the windowsill. Right next to the marijuana. Not really, just seeing if the law ,enforce- ment guys read this. Just kidding. Just kidding. By now that toe was looking like a chef salad! And it was near dinnertime, l'hollered out to the kitchen to Shirley, "What's for din- ner?" "Frying burgers," she replied. "Do you want a slice of onion on yours"? Sometimes she makes me nerv- OUS. Later, Dean In case you haven't noticed, Congress and the State Legislature are meeting at the same time.. That is considered by the Tea Party to be double jeopardy. While we hear much oratory about problems, we see limited ac- complishment, primarily because the proposed solutions have been too conventional. There are quick solutions to knotty problems if ve are willing to think creatively. ' Illegal Immigration: This issue has been stalled for at least 20 years and the problem has grown. Politicians haven't been able to solve this problem because they have a vested interest in any so- lution, most importantly how le- galization would affect their re- election. This is definitely a problem that could be solved by the right peo- ple - the. Indians. After all, they have had the most experience with unregulated immigration and Could quickly decide who Should be permitted to stay and who should leave. Same-Sex Marriage: The trend toward legalization of same-sex marriage appears to be unstop- pable. Everyone should be told that the legal groun ,ds for same-sex body wants to die." We need to Knotty Problems Require dramatiz the grandeur of heaven so folks on the edge will let go CreativeThinking when they no longer know where on earth they are. Cutting Cost of Go' emment: Two-house legislatures are a waste of time and money. Nebraska has been surviving with a one-house marriage is the same as ,for trust: There will be fewer mes-:i !egislature since 1937. So we polygamy. That tm tfi.will scare giiges about faith in God fin-kno it works. Activities in BiS' everybody straight ..... Williston. Who needs faith when !: marck over the past couple of Age of the Earth: In 1650, you can parade around the altar months prove that the two-house Archbishop James Usher calcu- with a .45 Colt on your hip? legislature wastes too much time lated that God created the earth in The fallacy in this suggestion is on frivolous bills, i.e. legalizing bottle rockets. One house could be 4004 B.C. A few years later, John that killers with a yen to attack a Lightfoot calculated that it oc- congregation would shoot the pas just as frivolous for less money. curred at 9 a.m. October 23. tor first because they will know Global Warming: Deny it until The other day; scientists ad- he's armed, we start getting lobsters out of the mitted that they had been incor- Balancing the Budget: Ex- water already broiled. rectly computing the age of the plaining why he robbed banks, One- Party System: There are more Lions in the Legislature earth. It is really 13.8 billion years Willie Sutton said because "that's than Democrats. If the Democrats old, 100 million more than had where the money is." Well, the aren't careful, the Lions may get been previously calculated. So Cayman Islands are where all bf recognition as the second party in Archbishop Usher was correct, the patriotic American tax dodgers North Dakota elections. give or take 13.8 billion years, have their money stashed. We Saturday Mail Delivery: Bring The age of the earth is imP0r- need to commissirn a band of back the Pony Express. tant because we need to know if it Cubans to capture the Islands and Higher Education: Some legis= is worth salvaging, take the money as a prize of war. lators would like to lower it by Faithless Clergy: Ten pastors in Curbing Medicare: This is the combining it with kindergarten. Williston have destroyed our na- most difficult problem. As Alison The kids don't want it. It should be tional motto: "In God We Trust." Krauss sings, "even though every- paroled to the Department of Cor- They want more guns and less body wants to go to heaven, no- rections. NDSU Agriculture Communication The abortion debate takes top priority Friday, March 29 was Good Fri- day. It was also the 59th day of the 63rd Legislative Assembly, mean- ing there are less than 20 days re- maining. Thursday, April 11, is the deadline for bills and resolutions to be reported out of committee in the second house and the fate of any re- maining bills will then be deter- mined by floor votes no later than May 2, the last day of the session. Some might look forward to that day as "Good Thursday," es- pecially those who might feel like they will be getting a reprieve from a mini eternity of partisanship and lengthy debate on abortion limita- tions and women's fights in the form of vo H9use bills, four Senate bills and a concurrent resolution. Three have been signed by the governor and likely face costly constitution- al challenges. HB 1305 will prohibit abortion for sex selection or genetic abnor- malities. The House voted in favor of the bill, 64-27, and the Senate fa- vored the bill 27-15. The governor signed it. HB 1456 places limitations on abortions after determination of a de- tectable heartbeat in an unborn child. The exception would be to "prevent the death of.the pregnant woman or to prevent serious risk and irreversible impairment of a major bodily function of the pregnant woman." The bill was passed 63-28 by the House, 26-17 by the Senate and signed by the governor. SB 2302 failed; it v as a bill to provide for the "ethical treatment of human embryos." SB 2303 also failed in a split de- cision; it passed in the Senate, 24- 23, but lost a floor vote in the House, 43-49. It would have "cre- ated and enacted.., certain medical procedures.., in relation to the def- inition of a human being.., and pro- vided directives to the department of human services regarding Med- icaid and other coverage for preg- nant women." And SB 2305 places limitations on physicians and abortion facilities, including ,admitting privileges at a hospital located within 30 miles of the abortion facility and staffpriv- ileges to replace hospital on-staff physicians at the hospital." The bill passed 30-17 in the Senate and 58-34 in the House. It was also signed by the governor. SB 2368 "creates and enacts... limitations and penalties for per- forming an abortion" and "amends and reenacts Century Code sections "relating to definitions, reporting re- quirements and the use of public funds for abortions and family plan- ning. ' It passed the Senate, 30-17, and the House, 60-32. It remains in education model of governance. conference committee. Around 40 bills addressed oil and SCR 4009 states: "The inalien2 gas and its economic impact on the able right to life of every human be, state have been introduced includ- ing at any stage of development ing flaring of gas, the legacy fund, must be recognized and protected." drilling and extraction, and a bill to The resolution calls for a constitu- create a controversial outdoor her- tional section add to be voted upon itage fund from oil and gas pro- by "qualified electors of North duction taxes. Dakota at the general election to be HB 1278 passed the House, 48- held in 2014." The resolution passed the Senate, 26-21, and House, 57- 44, but has been stalled in the Sen- ate with significant in-fighting and 35, and has been filed with the sec- retary of state, part!san battles between various The abortion and right to life talk elements for and against the bill. The was often harsh and accusatory, hang-ups have been disagreement House Majority Leader A1 Carlson, on advisory board makeup, the an- R-41, Fargo, said on the floor: nual amount ofmoney to be placed "You are either for life or against life in the fund, how it can or can't be ... but don't make this political." used and the powers and duties be- All of that angst was part of the tween the state and heritage organ- most controversial week during the izations. 63rd session which has seen 467 Editor's Note: In John Irby's last House bills filed, 47 concurrent column it was incorrect that the resolutions and one memorial res- North Dakota Farmers Union "re- olution expressing sorrow on the portedly pledged support" of SB passing and appreciation of"the loT- 221 t "and then flopped, returning at al and devoted service of our former subcommittee meetings with nu- colleagues." And the Senate has had merous amendments calling for 374 bills filed, 29 concurrent reso- lutions and the identical memorial exemptions, specific detail in some resolution to total 919 filed bills and cases (and less in others) and mod- resolutions, ification of stringent penalties." Another of the most talked-about The North Dakota Farmers Union topics so far has been taxation - with has "stood strong with our fellow 125 bills. The subjects included coalition members and the Ag 'tobacco, sales, fuel, property, motor Coalition," according to Kristi vehicles, insurance, income, gain- Schlosser Carlson, General Coun- ing, utilities, alcohol, and, of course, sel and Director of Government Re- coal and oil. lations for the Fanners Union. Higher education has also been highly debated with 93 filed bills or Joh,, lrbv decided to retire early in late, 2011 as editor o/'the Bismarck Tribune. He is now a resolutions, including 44 addressing ./r,'elance write1; priwae i w, stigator and man- higher education with an emphasis agement consultant, lie Can be reached at john- placed on restructuring the higher rohertirhy( hotmail.com. Extension Exchange Right Size Your matter how hungry we are. The Portions more we areserved, the more we Portion sizes have gotten larger eat. This leads to weight gain be- over the past 20 years, and so have cause people consume more calo- Americans. Larger portions add ries than they need. Weight gain up. Just 100 extra calories per day over time leads to overweight and can lead to a weight gain of 10 eventually obesity. pounds per year. There are many The following are some sug- different ways to control portions, gestions to keep in mind to help you One of the first is to know the cor- right-size your portions at meals and rect size of a portion, snacks: Learn What a Normal Por-. Prepare and eat more meals at tion Looks Like home. We tend to eat larger portions Learn to recognize normal por- when we eat out.. tion sizes and stick to them when Help children learn what a nor- .mal serving looks like. For exam- dining out or serving meals at. pie, measure cereal in the child's home. A portion is the amount of bowl and discuss that a bowl ofce- food or beverage a person chooses real and a serving of cereal can be to eat or drink. A serving is a stan- different. dard amount established by the Divide the contents of a large U.S. Food and Drug Administration. snack package into smaller con- Keep these tips in mind: 3 ounces tainers. of meat is the size of a deck of cards When eating out, avoid all-you- or the palm of your hand; 1 otmce can-eat buffets, "value meals", and of meat is the size of a matchbook; other deals that promote,overeating. 1 cup of potatoes, rice, or pasta Select restaurants that offer small- looks like.a tennis ball. One tea- er portions. * spoon of butter or margarine is the Share restaurant meals or take size of your thumb tip; 1 ounces part of the meal home. Ask for a to- of cheese is the size of 6 dice. go container up front and divide up Keep Seconds Out of Sight your meal. Research suggests that Don't serve meals family-style, purchasing a larger portion leads to Keep pots and serving dishes away an increase in calorie intake. from the table where it's all too easy Beware of mindless eating to go for seconds. It is easier to re- while watching TV. If you snack in think second helpings as you make front of the TV, put an appropriate your way from the table to the portion of food in a dish and leave stovetop. Remember, it takes about the food package in the kitchen. 20 minutes to feel satiated. By Grab a healthy snack if you are giving yourself time to think, you hungry between meals. It will pre- may realize you were not hungry vent overeating at meal time. enough for another helping after all. You can worry less about large Break Leftovers Down portions when you eat fruit and veg- Instead of using one large con- etables. Fruits and vegetables take tainer to store leftovers such as up lots ofspace on your plate with- casseroles, side dishes, or pasta, why out adding many calories. not separate them into individual- Serve food on a smaller plate ly sized containers? That way, to make normal portions look big- when you reach in the fridge to find ger. Limit your favorite sweetened something to reheat, you're re- beverage by drinking from a small- trieving just enough for one help- er glass. ing. Breaking down meal-sized servings into single servings will Resources." Cooperative Extension www.extension.org, and "Right-size Your help you limit your food intake with Portions" North Carolina School Nutrition no additional effort. Action Committee, a partnership of the N.C. Department of Public Instruction, N.C. Divi- Larger portion sizes encourage sion of Public Health and N.C. Cooperative people to eat and drink more, no Extension Service. Dates to Remember: April 3 Animal safety in Grafton 9-3 April 6 1:00 Apple tree pruning demonstration at the Extension Office (weather permitting) . April 10 Pesticide Training Registration 8:30 A.M. on state Energy Beet Juice Can be Stored for Ethanol Production The need for producing envi- ing beet juice through evaporation ronmentally friendly fuel altema- to produce a raw, thick beet juice tives to displace the use ofpetrole- and subsequently adjusting the pH um in the U.S. has scientists at many of the juice are effective. The tech- research universities Studying the nique helped retain more than 99 feasibility of potential biofuel feed- percent of the fermentable sugars in stocks, the juice stored for at least six At North Dakota State Univer- months at 23 degrees Celsius (ap- sity, the feasibility of using new sug- proximately 73 degrees F ihren- ar beet varieties, known as energy heit). beets, for ethanol production is un- During the study, the pH of the der study. Energy beets have char- raw, thick juice was adjusted and acteristics very similar to sugar controlled at alkaline and acidic lev- beets used for table sugar produc- els to find the most effective ranges tion. for sugar preservation. Sugar beets for table sugar pro- Although the juice was stored duction are stored conventionally in successfully, future research will be 9pen piles for up to six months un- directed toward determining con- der extremelY low temperatures, ditions for high-efficiency fermen- However; storing sugar beets in tation of the juice with the highest open piles increases the risk of.hot sugar retention during storage. spots forming, which could lead to The research was carried out by microbial degradation of sugars. Juan Vargas-Ramirez, a graduate Freezing also leads to the rupture student pursuing a doctorate degree of beet cell walls, making cell con- in the Department of Agricultural tents, including sugars, susceptible and Biosystems Engineering under to leaching during thawing and the guidance of Dennis Wiesenbom, washing. The thawing of sugar a professor. Other key project per- beets before processing requires sonnel include Darrin Haagenson, large quantities of energy, which research specialist and Scott Pryor, contributes to a less favorable associate professor. greenhouse gas life cycle assess- This NDSU research is part of a ment. larger effort initiated by BeetsAll Because of these storage prob- Biofuel to envision beets as a po- lems, new long-term storage tech- tential fee&tock for ethanol and oth- niques are needed to preserve fer- er industrial uses. BeetsAll Biofu- mentable sugars from energy beets el is a partnership between Green to allow for ethanol production Vision Group and Heartland Re- throughout the year. newable Energy. Other research Since 2010, a research group in sponsors and cooperators are the the Department of Agricultural and North Dakota Renewable Energy Biosystems Engineering at NDSU Council, North Dakota Agricultur- has studied the effectiveness of al Experiment Station and Ameri- long-term storage techniques on can Crystal Sugar. the preservation of energy beet fer- More information about the mentable sugars. NDSU research is available at Results indicate that concentrat- http://www.beetsallbiofuel.com. Editor's Note The Around the County columnn was not available this week. It will return as soon as possible. !